Building A Relationship With A New Horse

I believe that relationships are the reason that sets horses apart from any other hobby that a person could have. There are plenty of machines that can go faster, jump higher to give an adrenaline rush, and even cost less!

The one thing those machines can’t do is give you a shoulder to cry on when you’re having a rough day, make you laugh with their goofy personality, take care of you when you’re in a bind and don’t know how to get home off the side of a mountain.

Only horses can do that.

I recently had a friend purchase a new horse and asked if I had any tips for building up a relationship quickly besides excessive brushing and treats in the stall?

Here’s what I said… Relationships require trust and unfortunately, trust does take time to build up. However, I do have some thoughts on how to speed up that process with a horse.

Horses being prey animals need a leader. The leader of the herd, the boss mare, will tell the herd when and where to move their feet to keep them safe and fed.

The quickest way to a horse’s mind is through their feet. The more you can move their feet forward, backward, left, and right, the more you keep flipping the switch to their thinking side of their brain, and redirecting their attention onto you that you’re their leader.

Horses are very smart. They are quick to read your intentions. (This is why a zebra can drink next to a lion at the watering hole. The zebra can read that the lion’s intention is thirst, not hunger).

A funny analogy I used was, you (shouldn’t) go on one date with a guy and marry him the next, yet that’s kinda what we do when we try out and buy a horse. Yes, snuggling on the couch watching movies (treats and brushing in the stall) is a good way to bond, but it’s going out on dates, experiencing new things, and interacting in public that you will gain a true feel for the person you’re dating (getting your horse out and working with them in different situations.)

I’m sure you guessed what I said… try doing some groundwork.

Why groundwork? Well, you can quickly build a horse’s confidence through groundwork because the simple exercises that I teach are easy maneuvers for a horse to learn.

But that’s not what builds the confidence. Where the confidence and trust building really comes into play is your intent when teaching the horse these exercises.

If you are patient and kind waiting on a horse to figure out the correct answer, you don’t punish them for guessing incorrectly, and you release the pressure quickly and allow the horse to be left alone to process everything, this is where a horse can pick up on your intent of being a kind, fair leader pretty quickly.

THIS is what will jumpstart your trust and relationship with your horse.

So my recommendation to my friend was to pull the horse out of the stall and do 5-10 minutes of groundwork every so often just to spend time with him and create those date-like bonding moments where the thinking side of the horse’s brain is engaged and he can read your intent.

This doesn’t just work on new to you horses, this can be a great way to continue building a bond with your horses that you’ve had for years.

I’ve seen it myself time and time again with client horses. Once the client started incorporating a little groundwork to engage the horse’s mind routinely and give them a purpose, the horse became such a happier, and willing partner.